My Own Food For Thought...

TessieRose had a wonderful post today about her relationship with food post-band.  She basically verbalized exactly whats been on my mind these past several weeks.

My relationship with food pre-band was not anything out of the ordinary.  I didn't have major emotional ties to food like many obese people do.  I didn't have deep-seeded issues surrounding the way food made me feel.  I rarely turned to food when I was sad or mad or depressed.  I never binged.

But that doesn't mean that I didn't have problems with food.  Obviously food was a HUGE factor in my weight gain.  I loved to eat.  I loved the ritual of eating.  I loved the social aspect of eating with friends and family.  I also loved the taste of food.  Plain and simple.  If it tasted good, I ate it.  And, as time went on, I stopped censoring what I put in my mouth.  I fully gave in to my love of food and didn't let something like sheer quantity or nutritional quality stop me.  Between that and my total lack of physical exercise, I ballooned up to an astounding 297 lbs. 

But now that I've had the band for over six months, I've started noticing drastic changes in not only my eating habits, but with my general relationship with food.

Before, I used to eat anything and everything as long as it tasted good.  Now, I am picky about what I eat.  I only eat the stuff I TRULY WANT and/or NEED.  I don't want to "waste my time" (or pouch space lol) on something that just doesn't satisfy a want or fulfil a nutritional need.  Before, my favorite late-night snack of choice was PBJs.  I didn't see how I could ever give them up.  But now, I could honestly care less if I ever eat another PBJ again.

Before, on days like today when the teacher's lounge is FILLED with no less than 20 different goodies, I would have tried everything.  Even if I wasn't sure if I would like it or not.  I'd still try it.  And I'd keep munching on everything ALL DAY LONG just because it was there.  Now (today, for example), I only tried maybe four or five different things that I KNEW I wanted.  And I only tried a tiny bit of each of those things.  And while I've munched a little bit (hello, my office is 10 feet from the lounge), I've not come anywhere CLOSE to eating as much as I have in past years.

In general, food has become a much lower priority to me in the six months since I've had Lap-Band.  My life no longer revolves around food and my next meal and feelings of hunger (as misguided as they were). 

I can be around gobs of food and not eat hardly any of it and I can STILL have a fantastic time being social and laughing and talking with family and friends.  I can still sit and the dinner table with my husband and sons and talk about our day while I nibble on a tilapia fillet or even drink a protein shake. 

Food means so much less to me now that it did before.  But at the same time, it means so much more.  Because I'm not a slave to it any longer.  I don't view food as an enemy that I just can't stay away from.  Now I view it as something to be enjoyed, but not obsessed over.